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Reade, Charles, 1814-1884

"A Woman-Hater"

Then I, though I'm averse to the sex,
fall an easy, an immediate victim to the individual."
"Love at first sight."
"Not a bit of it. If she is as beautiful as an angel, with the voice of a
peacock or a guinea-hen--and, luckily for me, that is a frequent
arrangement--she is no more to me than the fire-shovel. If she has a
sweet voice and pale eyes, I'm safe. Indeed, I am safe against Juno,
Venus, and Minerva for two years and several months after the last; but
when two events coincide, when my time is up, and the lovely, melodious
female comes, then I am lost. Before I have seen her and heard her five
minutes, I know my fate, and I never resist it. I never can; that is a
curious part of the mania. Then commences a little drama, all the acts of
which are stale copies; yet each time they take me by surprise, as if
they were new. In spite of past experience, I begin all confidence and
trust: by-and-by come the subtle but well-known signs of deceit; so doubt
is forced on me; and then I am all suspicion, and so darkly vigilant that
soon all is certainty; for 'les fourberies des femmes' are diabolically
subtle, but monotonous. They seem to vary only on the surface.


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