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McCutcheon, George Barr, 1866-1928

"Mr. Bingle"


Bingle, but that anything more noticeable would cause the good
gentleman to take his trade elsewhere. As she said to the distressed
Diggs one evening, after carefully observing that the kitchen door was
closed: "When I order a half ton of coal from you for the parlour
stove, there's no sense in you weighing it out by ounces. Guess at it,
and then after you've guessed as near right as you know how, double
the amount. Mr. Bingle isn't going to weigh the coal, you know. And
when it comes to rice and hominy and cooking apples and all such
things, just let your imagination do the measuring. If a pound of
coffee happens to look like a pound and a half to you, don't forget
the extra cups you used to have every afternoon at Seawood. And if I
should happen to send for the cheapest tea you've got in stock, don't
overlook the fact that there is an expensive kind. Once in a while you
might make ME a present of a couple of dozen oranges, some bananas and
nuts, and you might sometimes ask Mr. Bingle to sample a new brand of
smoking tobacco you're thinking of carrying.


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