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McCutcheon, George Barr, 1866-1928

"Mr. Bingle"

A very small nest will accommodate a very large
family of growing mice; the tighter they are packed in the nest the
better off they are in zero weather. Moreover, in a pinch, the
parental church-mouse may stave off famine by resorting to a
cannibalistic plan of economy, thereby saving its young the trouble of
growing up to become proverbial church-mice. It may devour its young
when it becomes painfully hungry, and not be held accountable to the
law. With commendable frugality, the church-mouse first eats off the
tail of its offspring. Then, if luck continues to be bad, the
remainder may be despatched with due and honest respect for the laws
of nature.
Now, with Mr. Bingle, it was quite out of the question for him to
devour even so small a morsel as Napoleon without getting into serious
trouble with the law, and it was equally impossible to obtain the same
degree of comfort for his young by packing them into a four room flat.
And then the church-mouse doesn't have to think about shoes and
stockings and mittens and ear-muffs, to say nothing of frocks and
knickerbockers.


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