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McCutcheon, George Barr, 1866-1928

"Mr. Bingle"

As the former advanced in years and
characteristics, it became more and more apparent to Mr. Bingle that
his fifth-born was not of Italian descent, despite the fact that the
authorities at the Foundlings' Home had him down on the records as the
offspring of a Mr. and Mrs. Vanesi, lost in one of the factory fires
in the city of Brooklyn. Mr. Bingle was convinced, as time went on,
that the tags on certain infants had been accidentally misplaced by
careless attendants, and that Reginald's nick-name, bestowed by
Frederick and Wilberforce in their frivolous wisdom, was not so far
out of the way as it might have seemed if he had not been possessed of
his own vague misgivings. They called him Abey. As for Harold, he was
unmistakably Irish, although the hospital people declared that he was
German to the core when Mr. and Mrs. Bingle went there to pick out a
healthy Teuton to add to their collection. They were positive that
they wanted a German baby; nothing else would do, they announced
clearly and positively to the superintendent in charge of the
maternity ward.


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